I Do, Again: Second Wedding Etiquette

Please note it is your responsibility to evaluate the accuracy, completeness and usefulness of any information, opinion or advice contained in the content below.

by Garnett Foards

For many couples planning a wedding, the steps can seem like dj vu. Second weddings are almost as common as first unions. For this reason, proper rules of etiquette have been placed on second weddings. Of course, you should use your own judgement, and remember that many wedding rules are now seen as outdated. The reaction of your former spouse is only one tender area to consider when planning your wedding.

Before You Say “I Do”:

It’s important to consider the feelings of your former spouse when announcing your upcoming wedding. Have the courtesy to tell him or her in person, rather than risk the chance of your former spouse hearing the news as gossip. If you have a cordial relationship, tell your ex-spouse over coffee or dinner. If the relationship is less friendly, a formal phone call will suffice. You may have a friendly relationship with your former in-laws, and they should be offered the same sort of courtesy.

If the couple has children to consider, it is polite to inform them of their decision. Regardless of their children’s protests, this should not be omitted or done at the last minute. Children have a longer time to adjust and accept certain truths. One of them is the idea of having a new mom or dad.

Therefore, a second wedding etiquette stipulates that mom and dad to make their engagement known to the children first. If the relationship is good between the kids and the new stepparent, they would respect their parent’s wishes and support their union.

Finer Points Of The Wedding:

If you have already been married once before, the process of the second wedding will be easier to handle. You and your future spouse should remember that a second wedding is typically a smaller affair involving family and a few close friends. It is considered impolite to ask your former spouse to attend, but if you enjoy a friendly relationship you may feel free to do so.

It’s important to have an open discussion regarding the budget for your wedding. Expenses are usually shared, and questions about who will pay for what should be settled privately between you and your future spouse.

Many couples celebrating a second wedding choose to hold the event out of town. Often, older couples have more disposable income and are able to afford the luxury of celebrating the marriage in a foreign place. This isn’t always true of every guest, however. Consider whether your guests are able to pay for travel, accommodation, and related expenses.

Second Wedding Locations:

The most important rule of planning the location for your second wedding is to be sure it’s not a spot that holds emotional ties to any past unions. A second wedding is a particularly emotional time, and either partner can have unspoken uncertainties about past marriages. Working together, mutually choose a location and theme for both the ceremony and the reception. When you’ve agreed, you may then share the news with your friends and family.

It is courteous for the couple to provide transportation for members of their wedding party. Make sure that everyone has a ride, and determine how many cars must be rented. Taking care of these arrangements well before the wedding date can save stress and money.

Choosing Wedding Colors:

Regarding the color of the dress, it is acceptable for the bride to wear a white wedding gown. The groom and groomsmen may wear tuxedos. For a second wedding etiquette, you can still more or less follow the traditional color palette.

Reaffirming Your Vows:

Not all second weddings are about creating new families. The second wedding etiquette can be employed to celebrate a renewal of vows to each other. This is usually done to mark a marriage’s milestone like the 25th year or the 50th year anniversary.

This type of wedding is typically more private and intimate than the first wedding, and often more joyous. Reaffirming one’s love and dedication to a husband or wife is a beautiful and moving gesture. If your second wedding is a celebration of renewed vows, limit your guest list to your closest friends and family. Make the event as carefree and effortless as possible.

For Guests:

If you are invited to a second wedding, it is polite to bring a gift. While the use of a bridal registry is optional, every couple can use and appreciate thoughtful gifts. A gift of cash is always welcome, and second wedding etiquette dictates that the envelope is handed to a member of the family.

It’s not at all difficult to follow the rules of etiquette for a second wedding. As in a first marriage, the most important point is to be considerate of your partner’s feelings and wishes. As for the honeymoon, it should be sweeter than your first. The lessons that you learned in your first marriage should have made you stronger and wiser, so that you may enjoy a happy and successful second union.

Freelancer Garnett Foards is an essayist for a variety of web magazines, on family reunion and family picture themes.

Article Source: Article North directory

Free Newsletter

Sign up for the free Daily newsletter, filled with tips and ideas on getting married, marriage, weddings, diamonds, advice, wisdom and more. Your email address will be kept confidential and won't be shared. Easily unsubscribe at any time.

If you enjoy the free information available on this site, you're sure to enjoy the free newsletter as well:

Site Search Tags:

Share and Enjoy:

December 29 2007 09:37 pm | Love & Marriage and Wedding Ceremony, Vowes & Speeches and Wedding Tradition & Etiquette

Trackback URI | Comments RSS

About to Get Married . com

Marriage, Bride, Jewelry, Wedding Advice